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First, many thanks for making this available!
This was a very interesting exercise for me, in particular the fact that I couldn’t find an emotion on site when I was trying to
mediate on one. I had to force the recollection emotional instances to think about them. I choose to do this meditation
because I usually have a very hard time controlling my emotions and typically make decisions based more on those
emotions than rather than thought or practicality. Generally I also feel strongly about most things, most of the time,
so I was surprised about the difficulty of finding and sticking to an an emotion to meditate on. Toward the end of the
session I had a very beautiful pleasant happy feeling, but I also felt it was a bit sneaky. That is I felt I was giving myself a
pleasant distraction away from the meditation. Thanks again!
@Oana Great comments! Mingyur Rinpoche gives teachings on working on with emotions in the Tergar courses. These are available both online and in workshops all over the world. See tergar.org/events/
Thanks so much for your post!
No emoltions were available as I sat. So I tried focusing my solar plexus where I feel emotions, at the same time thinking of something that was bothering me. This produced tiny disturbance which I could use for my meditation.
On another occasion I was able to intercept an instance of impatience as soon as it hit me. After a few seconds of awareness it dissipated.
Mostly I had trouble “summoning up” strong emotions. I was able to think of previously felt strong destructive emotions, but really it was the memory of the emotions that came to mind rather than the emotions themselves. Then I would remember Rinpoche’s instruction regarding not focusing on the thing (or person) that elicited a strong emotion, but rather the emotion itself, and usually it seemed more like a thought rather than an emotion. Okay. I haven’t done this practice very many times, but I have experienced and noticed some emotion towards the ends of my meditation times, and the emotion was that of becoming moderately disappointed. I watched it to the extent that I realized the reason for the disappointment was an unfulfilled expectation and I was the one who caused that. I wonder if it would be useful to wait and do “shortcut meditations” when everyday circumstances elicit strong emotions (and they often do) as a way to getting the “feel” of this practice instead of getting on the cushion formally and expecting emotions to arise?
Yes, I had a similar experience to you. The memory rather than the emotion. Maybe I was a bit wary of summoning the emotion just in case I got carried away by it, and got distracted. I will keep going with this meditation as I think it will help to soften emotions that sometimes hinder daily life for me.